Who Says Infomercials Suck

Our #1 Product, The Urban Rebounder® 

Everyone is probably wondering what the hell is I am talking about. Well, my new job is a customer service representative for a company specializing in distribution and fullfillment for the Direct Response Television Industry. Better known to normal people as infomercials.

Honestly, I am not thrilled to constantly be defending products that are completely practical, engineered in China for only the greatest quality. (Sarcasm) Some of the calls coming into the call center are great. Like the guy who was out there trimming his lawn with a product we sell. (It shall remain nameless, but you have seen this on TV) His wife to order extra cutters and complained that her one-armed husband should not be out doing yardwork.

We are customer service for many different companies, but nothing beats the infomercials. People are always calling up our 800 number just to tell us about the stupid products they have invented and want them to be sold on paid programming. The truth of the matter is, it really only costs about $1000 to advertise for a half hour after 2 p.m. on cable.

So next time you think that infomercials suck, remember all the people they are making rich in America. Certainly not me, but I don't mind making money for listening to people's problems with their Urban Rebounder®

The Golden Palace of Shameless Promotion

GoldenPalace.com purchased an invitation to Jennifer Wilbank's wedding at an eBay auction held Tuesday. It is just the latest wacky and outlandish attempt at attracting press for a company known for pushing the advertising envelope.

The online casino purchased the invitation of a guest to the wedding of the now infamous "Runaway Bride." GoldenPalace.com paid $355 for the latest piece in what is becoming an ever outlandish collection. Other recent purchases include new Pope Benedict XVI's Volkswagen Golf, Britney Spears' used pregnancy test, and food that looks like holy figures.

People routinely agree to rent their bodies to GoldenPalace for advertising space. Recently, a Georgia woman was paid to have the casino's name written on her stomach during the extent of her pregnancy. She recently gave birth to a happy baby girl named Mariah.

The GoldenPalace.com has an insatiable appetite for the spotlight. They are willing to explore a new frontier in advertising. By buying the rights to name a couples newborn triplets, the GoldenPalace.com creates an ideal relationship with the consumer by paying people and getting airtime.

Is it shameless promotion or is it clever marketing? You tell me after seeing all of the crazy ads yourself at

1991 Ponitac Grand Prix Saved From Going to the Junkyard

Well, I did it. After 26 years of life, I finally have my first car. It may not look like much on the outside, but she runs like a champ. And for only $20 and a rebuilt alternator, the car was a steal.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank (yet again) two of my best friends in the whole world. Jason and Melissa, I couldn't have done it without ya. They were more than happy to help me celebrate with a few vodka drinks.

Anyone that knows me will be happy to know that they will never have to pick me up again. (You like that don't ya Seth.) Now all I need is to get a driver's license. Unfortunately, there is about a 3 month wait to take your driver's test at and DMV in the state of Wisconsin.

No more waiting at the bus stop, no more wondering how the hell am I gonna get home, and no more being late to work.

So this is a warning that after July 14th, stay off the sidewalks, because I will be cruisin.